Dear Self: #2

When you are given the choice to choose between someone who is tactless and someone who is nice and sweet, choose the tactless for a friend. Tactless people tell you things upfront, you always know how they feel. Nice and sweet people will trick you into putting your guard down and stab you in secret. And you already know who they are.

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Dear Future Boyfriend,

I can’t count the number of times people told me that I “should get a boyfriend” or that I “should get married”. So I’m sure that your presence in my life is a relief. At least to everyone who always feared that I would end up an old maid like so many in our family. As for me, I am happy (I hope).

Please don’t think that I am only with you because of this. I do not know who you are yet but let me assure you that if I am with you then it will not be because of something so shallow. So chill dude!

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No, I do not know who this baby is but you have to admit, this baby is cute.

However, I am not sure how you would feel if I tell you that I don’t need you. That’s right! I said I don’t need you. But before you let your ego get the best of you, allow me to explain.

There will only be three reasons why I am with you: I love you, I want you and I chose you. Need is not a part of it.

I always believe that being with someone only because you need them is shallow and ridiculous. I like to think of myself as a more matured person than that. I like to think that I am with you because I want to and because I chose to.

To say that “I need you” implies that I am only with you because I have to but given an option I would prefer to be with someone else. At least this is how I understand it.

If I am with you now, then it means I chose you and you alone. It means you are not an option but the only answer to the question.

I always believe that it is better to be wanted than needed. If you are only needed, you can be discarded when your usefulness has run its course. The person may not really want you but only chose to be with you because you serve a purpose. I do not like that. I am with you because I want to be with you. There are no conditions.

I am here out of my own free will. This is my choice, not my friends nor my family. You are my choice. You are not a product of someone else’s idea of an ideal man. You are my ideal man.

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Love not war

Your presence in my life is not subject to whether or not you can give me expensive gifts. I assure you, I do not require such. It does, however, depend on whether or not you treat me well.

You see, I grew up loved and taken cared of. Love is not something I have to look for because I have always been loved. So, I guess it is only normal that I ask that you love me at least as much as you can possibly do. I am not going to ask you to love me as much as my family because that would be impossible. My family is my family and their love is of a different brand. Let’s not try to compete with that.

I also ask that you respect me. There are some lines I will never cross and some things I will never compromise. Respect that and we may just survive.

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True Love Waits.

Please also understand that choosing to be with you may have been one of the hardest decisions I have ever made in my life. I love my freedom and giving up even a piece of it is a big deal to me.

Let’s put it this way, the reason why I don’t have a boyfriend at 26 is because I can’t imagine giving up my freedom. So being with you must have cost me days and nights of analyzing and weighing pros and cons of this. So please don’t ever think that you can just take me for granted or cheat on me easily. Remember that I have no problems being alone. I can leave you even if it would be one of the hardest things I have to do.

I also have some few reminders for you, just in case I haven’t told you yet.

1. It doesn’t matter how much I love you, you cannot have my password.

2. There is such a thing as privacy. No, it doesn’t mean I am hiding something. I respect yours, you respect mine.

3. If the time will come when you no longer want me, please don’t cheat. Be honest. Cheat on me and I will break you. Or my friends and family will. Your choice.

4. There is no such thing as monthsary. Puh-lease!

I know this not the most romantic thing anyone can read in their lifetime. I am not the most romantic person in the world and writing a love letter is not really my strongest suit. Well, this is not a love letter. It’s more like a manifesto.

Whoever you are, wherever you’re from, someday we will meet and you will have to read this. I really don’t know what else to tell you. I guess if you have any feedbacks, feel free to see me or email or text or whatever. I’m just here.

Xoxo,
Your Future Girlfriend

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*I apologize for any spelling or grammatical errors. Proofreading via mobile is a challenge for me.*