The Question We All Ask At Some Point

Not all stories start with once upon a time. Sometimes you just realize it has started and it is too late for you to get out of it. You have been written and there is nothing you can do but see it through until the story ends.

I am not sure where my story started or when I realized it has started. I am not sure if I should say that I woke up with a start. I am not even sure if I was asleep in the first place. I try to recall the last thing I did. Nothing comes up.

It feels like one moment I was nothing and then I am. It feels like I have lived forever and yet haven’t lived at all. I look around me and I see people smiling at me like they know me and I know that I know them but I couldn’t understand why I have to know them or why they have to be a part of my life. Why am I here?

I once saw this movie where one character said, “All will be revealed in the end.” (X-Men Apocalypse, if I am not mistaken.)  Well, I am still waiting.

Blind Side

When I was in school, I had a classmate who was absent for a long time because she got hit by a bicycle while trying to avoid a car. It was funny back then. We laughed at how crazy it sounded.

Today, I suddenly remembered that incident and I realized how often our life takes such a turn. Our attention is so taken away by the big things and we ended up getting blind-sided by the small ones. They catch us by surprise often because we have not prepared for them. It’s not that we do not anticipate them happening, we just usually have the notion that since they are smaller, we can just dodge them without a problem. Sometimes we do. But sometimes, we get hit by the proverbial bicycle and we end up bruised and bloody.

In relationships, oftentimes it is not the big arguments that end it. It’s the small things that we choose to ignore and had taken its toll. Sometimes we ignore things thinking that it’s nothing major. It’s neither worth the time nor the effort. We’ll just ignore it and hope it goes away or we learn to live with it. Whichever comes first. Then it happens too often and it creates tiny tears in our relationships, slowly but surely unravelling the bond we try to carefully create. Then before we know it, the tiny scratches turned into bigger wounds and by then it is too late for us to stop things from breaking.

The small things won. The bicycle hits us and we are sent flying into the very mess we’ve been trying to avoid in the first place.

Life is funny that way.