An Open Letter to Anyone Who Has Ever Stood Me Up or Canceled Plans At The Last Minute.

I never thought the day will come when I will find myself saying thank you to everyone who stood me up or canceled plans at the last minute. I can’t really tell you to go to hell because as much as you are annoying, most likely, we’re still friends. You know I always believe that there is a special punishment for people like you. If there is not one yet, then there should be.

I think, and I still do, that your kind is a whole other species and trust me when I tell you that I used to hate your kind with all my soul’s worth. Should I say sorry? You wish.

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A foot selfie. Or whatever you call it. I had to take it because you weren't there to take my photo.

All the same, I thank you. You might be wondering why. (No, you did not save my life because you’re late or you forgot our plans or you suddenly have other plans. Yes, I still think you’re an asshole for saying yes and making different plans with different people and then ditching me at the last minute because “you’re cool with it, right?” Yes, you’re not the only person in the world who’s done that and no it doesn’t make you less of an asshole.)

But yeah, evaluating my experiences with people like you made me a better person. Trust me, I had to re-evaluate myself countless times before I could convince myself that your total lack of courtesy and respect for my time has actually contributed something to my life.

Here are five reasons why I am a better person because of you.

1. I wouldn’t have found the courage to travel alone if not for people like you. You see, I got tired of waiting for you to make-up your mind and make a decision. I woke up one day and realized that if I keep on waiting for people to join me, I will never get anywhere. So, scared as I was, I took the risk.

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yeah, just me and my feet. All alone in this wide, wide, world

2. I learned to be flexible. You never stick to your choice and you rarely honor your words and because of this, I learned to adapt faster to sudden changes in our “plans”.

3. I understood the importance of a back-up plan. Being used to your last minute cancelations and sudden change of heart, I learned to come up with strategies that will help me reach my goals and destinations even if you suddenly decide to leave me in the middle of nowhere.

4. You taught me that I can be happy on my own. Yes, to be honest, it did feel weird the first time I had to do things on my own because you suddenly decide that you have better things to do than go with me as planned. Yeah, I felt insulted and yeah I did hate you for that. But well, I also found my inner happiness. Corny, I know. But it is true. I realized that being around people is not a requirement to be happy and I can actually be happy even if I am all alone. And I also realized how amazing it is to travel alone. Thank you.

5. I learned that if I don’t expect anything, I will not be disappointed. I think, well I hope, it is obvious to you by now that I stopped expecting you to keep your word after the nth time you changed your mind. I know. It is a sad thing and I wish I can change that. But this is what you taught me. This is why I never get disappointed anymore when you tell me at the last minute that you changed your mind (again). I think I will be more suprised if you did manage to go when you say you will.

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Like a wilting flower. This is how being disappointed felt like.

Grudgingly, I have to acknowledge that you have done something positive in my life. Although these realizations doesn’t make you less annoying, it does make me feel a bit better.

I guess I wouldn’t be who I am now if you are not what you are. I wouldn’t learn to take risks or deal with challenges if you are more decisive.

Don’t worry about disappointing me, you have trained me well and I take my training at heart. I still have a hard time taking your word for anything but don’t worry, you’ll get used to it. Afterall, I got used to your kind right?

Xoxo,

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